Doctrines of a three-year-old

Today Sage got out the microphone and narrated about ten of her favorite scripture stories for me---all spoken directly and importantly into her mircrophone (the same one I used to get her attention in a past FHE lesson).

I had to jot down some of the doctrine she preached:

NOAH: "It rained for forty days and forty nights and forty mornings."

JESUS: "Jesus had a problem. He was dead. And he was hanging on a cross."

CREATION: "God made the earth, and he made light and dark, water, animals, plants, trees, flowers, leaves, bushes,..." [A little botanist in the making?]

NEPHI TO LAMAN & LEMUEL: "Don't touch me, or you'll have to get a shot." [shocked]

MOSES: "Moses had a lamb. Because lambs are for eating. [breaking into song:] 'The lambs give us clothes, the lambs give us clothes. Hi-ho the dairy-o, the lambs give us clothes.' And Moses had one because there were so many yummy lambs to eat. And he eat and eat and eat...."
[Sage was obsessed with her stuffed lamb for at least 2 years. Naturally, she was traumatized to learn of the importance of the lamb in Old Testament sacrifices, and especially at the first Passover. (Thanks, Becca.) Becca and Mark did some quick talking to convince her that lambs were good for food and sacrifices and wool for clothes...and we decided not to revisit the Passover events until she's older, or less attached. I think some of the Moses story got lost in the whole lamb fiasco, as demonstrated by her narrative about Moses tonight.]

CLOSING SONG: [This one's for Danielle, who loves all of Mark's songs:] After Sage went to bed, Mark and I were laughing about her understanding of the scripture stories. Mark sang to the tune of "Follow the Prophet": "Now we're in a world where Sagers is confused..."