Today I noticed Mark scribbling away on his notebook. A few minutes later, he passed over the project he'd been poring over--the solution to all our problems. It was labeled "Comprehensive Health Reform." It was a grand plan, consisting of a plan for us and a different plan for Sage. Each plan had lists of goals, rewards and minor punishments, and included sketches of charts with places for stickers.
Here's a sneak peek. One of the goals was to eat one sweet only per day. This may sound like it's ridiculously simple to achieve, and not worth the ink it takes to list as a goal. For us, well, to make this goal, we might as well be fasting. Especially in the terribly delicious last two months of the year--the ones sandwiched in between Halloween and New Year's and including Thanksgiving and Christmas. See how timely Mark's project is?
Mark's health reform goals are no ordinary goals. They are like "Choose your own adventure" goals. If you choose a different path, there is still an ending (goal) to deal with the situation. For example, the one sweet per day goal is equipped with two possibilities. Number one, I choose to eat my sweet at/after dinner. This is only allowed if I have eaten my required three veggies two fruits already. Never fear, though. If I choose to eat my sweet at lunchtime, Mark has allowed a little leeway: I only have to have eaten one veggie and one fruit to legally consume my daily sweet.
The goals were designed to reach into all areas of our lives where bad habits have developed--balanced eating, exercising, bedtimes, scripture reading, and more. One goal specific to Sage was "No bajar de la cama." [No getting out of bed.] That's my favorite one.
I don't deny that my apple crisp craving, chocolate eating, blog writing/reading, midnight reading, sedentary lifestyle needs a bit of reform. Mark's plan is like the extended Williams version of "Body for Life"...but without the pre- and post- pictures taken in skimpy spandex outfits. In the words of Suzy, "I'm glad someone's being assertive with my life." I like it. More comprehensive details forthcoming.
5 comments:
Is Mark available for reforming other people's health as well? I need an iron fist in my life, and it clearly isn't mine or cookie-making Paul's.
Also: I love the new picture of Sage. She looks so grown up!
Comprehensive health reform sounds like a guilt inflecting legal memo! Did he write it during church? And does it include me, since I am apparently a member of the family? --Janel Woodbury
Tell Mark we need his services at this house (just don't tell Dad). --Mom
Or Rich.
Janel - I love reading your blog so much. You are so creative and able to see the humour in everyday life. It helps that Mark does hilarious things like make a choose-your-own-adventure health plan.
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