Unfortunately for Eliza's chance with Santa, this naughty face has been all too common lately. It showed up several months ago. Since then it has become rather common, as has the accompanying behavior.
This has been a hard year for Eliza. I have wondered what to chalk it up to. Middle child syndrome? Terrible Twos/Threes? Or is it just that she got ousted from "baby" position and retaliated in negative ways to get the attention back? She was fully potty trained a year ago, so she doesn't get attention for that. It's Sage who started school this year, and Lily who is first to get immediate needs met. And then there's Eliza--the one that's always stepping on Lily's hands and feet and pushing Sage's buttons. It's been a struggle for me to know how to deal with my first ever Middle Child.
Yesterday my sister-in-law stopped by and she was telling me about her Christmas presents for the kids. She told me that her nine year-old son's Christmas wish was to go on an overnight horseback riding trip with only his dad. So that's exactly what they planned for son and dad to do on Christmas night. How awesome is that? (If only Sage would wish for an overnight stay at Embassy Suites with her mom for her Christmas wish!)
In all seriousness, I think my sister-in-law really stumbled onto something genius--giving kids exactly what they want. Not the "Barbie Diamond Castle Princess Dress Up Lounge" wants but the perfect-activity-to-do-with-just-my-mom[or dad] want. Perhaps it's not a stretch to even call these needs.
Doesn't every kid crave undivided attention from a parent? And not just the time associated with timeouts. [Eliza gets plenty of that kind.] In a moment of honesty this year, I realized that every single time my dad calls on the phone I find myself racking my brain for clever things to say to make him laugh. Even though I'm an adult with kids of my own, deep down I still desperately want to make him proud of the "witty and clever daughter" he raised. I don't really want to go on an overnight horseback riding trip with him, but I know that I still crave his attention and approval.
So last night, Mark and I put out of our minds all of the wrapped presents we have for our kids in order to think about what they really might want/need. And we decided to give each kid the gift of choosing a date with Mom and Dad (separately).
My guess is that Eliza will want to be read to, maybe at the library. And my guess is that Sage will want to go to Lagoon (and we'll say no), and then she'll pick to go to the swimming pool--not the kid part, but the laps pool. And I don't think either of them will mind stopping for a frostee at Wendy's on the way home. And if she could talk, I'm almost positive Lily would ask to be able to climb up and down our stairs (with no baby gate) for an hour. Pure bliss.
And who knows? Maybe we'll see less of the naughty and more of the nice after our parent/kid dates. Or maybe we'll just end up with three requests to go a McDonalds playplace, which is not my idea of pure bliss. If that's the case, I'm asking Santa to send Mark and me to Embassy Suites.
Merry Christmas!
15 comments:
Janel! You are so cool! What a good mom and wife you are! Merry Christmas! :)
Darling faces on that Eliza- so much personality! You're such a good mom. You better blog about those dates because I think I want/need to copy your ideas. :) Merry Christmas!
A great idea. And Eliza's adorable . . . even when she's on the "Naughty List."
This made me cry in the best way. Oh my gosh: I'm SO pregnant.
Good idea! I used to love special time with mom, and I'll admit--I always try to think of some excuse when Dad finds my car locked--i think we never grow out of wanting our parents' approval
What a fantastic idea! I think we'll try that next year. This year, Avey would just want to watch Beauty and the Beast over and over with us sitting on the couch with her.
Perfect! I totally remember parent dates with my mom and dad. Most of them involved dairy queen, but so special to me:)
Brilliant! Why didn't I think of that sooner? I wonder what Soraya will ask for...
Family: It's about time!
Definitely something to be said for that, we're all about lunch dates and movies with the kids, although not so much the one on one...we'll have to give that a try. Merry Christmas!
I think it's her name. ANYONE named Elizabeth Joy is bound to have naughty faces all year around :) Even if she is 25 with two kids. The naughty face still shows it's terrible face. I think I know that certain someone that wanted to go on an overnight with his dad. Good sport on such a cold night. It was so good to see you guys too. We loved getting to see your house. Thanks for watching the kids for us too. That was WAY above and beyond what we were expecting! Dinner was a million times better without them.
Now, keep in mind I have only one child, BUT I have come to the conclusion that when she is bugging me the most is when I just need to shut down whatever I'm doing and play cars or house with her and she will turn into a magically wonderful child. They just want attention.
Great idea. Although truthfully I think you are already good at that kind of thing... you and Mark both. Lily told me last week she wants to go to Embassy Suites with you, by the way.
Oh Janel - that Eliza! Love those pics. Let me know how it goes. I try so hard to give lots of individual attention, but it is hard! The date idea does work good though!
I am still going on Daddy-daughter dates with my dad, only now he is 85 and lives with me. He gave me my first orchid (a corsage) and he took me dancing : last Christmas, my daughter danced with him at the party at mom's nursing home: he still talks about it and she will remember it forever. Wonderful memories.
(PS: I'm Miriam's mom in law)
I just have to say again how hilarious the right picture of Eliza is. It makes me laugh every time.
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